Laughing at Ourselves

There are times you wish you were recording the scene. 

My husband and I were looking for, what we like to call, "Squeeze Cheese". You know, the stuff that's-bad-for-you in a can that swirls or gushes out when you push the top nozzle like you do on the whipped cream cans. 

Anyway......we couldn't find any of it at one store so we went to another, slightly higher-end store in a fancier part of town. We found the shelf well stocked with squeeze cheese, so we proceeded to grab about 4 or 5 cans of the stuff. 

We get to the checkout register where a teenage boy is looking bored and ready to end his shift for the night and go home. 

He looks at our bounty of squeeze cheese with a tiny twinkle of curiosity, but proceeds to run the cans over the scanner with the usual "Hello, have you found everything, blah, blah".

The next thing I know, my husband catches the boy's eye, nudges his head in my direction saying, "Sex fetish."

Both the boy and I look at my husband wondering if we heard what we thought we heard when my husband blurts out, "Yeah. She likes to cover me with cheese and call me cracker."

I laugh. The boy turns 5 shades of red and laughs nervously. I tell him that my husband is joking and we leave the store.

Yes. We are those people that others tell stories about. 😁🤣

Easily Offended

About a week ago or so, I was poking around on messenger and noticed that I had some 'Spam' messages. So of course, I HAD to look. 

One of these messages was from some woman telling me that whatever it was I had made a comment on, or reacted to, was NOT funny and "how would you like it if you got raped by MS-13? OH, but you're so ugly they would probably kill you right away."

Ummm....mmkaay. First of all, she never referenced what it was that I so badly offended her by commenting on, and, really? Do you feel the need to attack someone you don't know so harshly? 

I don't condone evil by spewing evil so I probably disagreed with something blatantly false in the whole post, yet she chose to attack me as if I were the mother of all terror groups. Yes, my vagina is the devil's playground. 🙄🤦‍♀️

Chill lady. It's Facebook, not the Bible. 

However, I did agree to her assessment of my looks while judging her on her intelligence and sensitivity.  

She got blocked. I went on with my life. 

#dontcondoneevilbyspewingevil

Abandoned Memories

Imagine if these old places could talk. 

I wonder what they would say?

Would they tell us about the sadness of being abandoned after long years of service? Would they tell us how the roof leaks, the boards are rotting, and the basement is full of water? 

Would you want to hang around and listen to that? Or to step inside?

Probably not.

I prefer to believe they would tell of the families they harbored under their sheltering roofs. The joys of seeing children born, the smell of great meals being prepared in their kitchens, and the prayers they heard being said at night. The gentle way they were cared for by the people living inside until it became clear they were no longer able to shelter them any longer. And now, how they belong to the memories of generations that will love them forever. 

Think about it. What legacy do you prefer to hold in the minds of those who love you? Tell the great stories. Tell the uplifting stories. Bring joy to those around you even if you may be falling apart. What you give will be returned tenfold. Give hope, give love.

~Cynthia French Gatlin

Out to Lunch

My husband and I went out to eat tonight at a higher end restaurant. 

I had to go, you know, so I went to the ladies room. 

I sat down to, you know, and I noticed this yellow thing on the ground. It took me a minute, but once I realized what it was, I had to chuckle to myself. 

Yeah, I couldn't help but wonder how that happened. 🤔 😧😲😬😆

I mean, I once questioned the ability of corn to remain whole on it's passage through our bodies, but I never once thought it would strike out on it's own once the journey was done. 🤣🤣🤣